Unpack the Extra Pounds You’re Packing On

Lorna's Voice

Let’s face it People, bathing suit season is behind us (unless you live in one of those places that’s always freaking hot and sunny).

That means it’s time to bundle up, which means it’s time to cover up, which means it’s easier to camouflage those few extra pounds your body has been aching to put on.

And the packing begins.

Heck, we’re getting into prime pound-packing season:

1. Oktoberfest (when everyone is German, has sausage breath and is drunk)

2. Halloween (when candy is its own food group)

3. Thanksgiving meals (when you know you’re finished when your clothes start to explode)

4. Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa/Festivus Super-Calorific partying, and New Year’s Pre-Healthy-Resolution alcohol and hors d’oeuvre megabinging (no explanation necessary)

Well, People, I’m here to help. Yes. That’s just the kind of selfless, party-pooper I am.

I have discovered seven, count ’em, seven reasons why people “mysteriously” gain weight.  Well, I read about them…

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